"Remembering Freedom And Who Died For It" (title by Star Press)

Recently during vacation, I awoke at 4:42 a.m. to a frightening mix of intermittent, deafening buzzing and pulsating, blinding light.

Panicked and confused, it took me a second to realize that the fire alarm was going off. As I headed toward the door just a few steps away, I couldn't find my daughter because of the strobe of the lights, so I called her name and turned to pull her out of her bed.

Because she was already up and moving, I banged my forehead against hers so hard I saw stars, which only heightened my discombobulation.



Once we were assembled outside on the lawn, I realized I was wearing a knee-length night shirt and felt a little exposed, although everyone else was in the same vulnerable situation. The irony is, being the worry-wart that I am, whenever I travel, I always sleep in exercise pants and a T-shirt just in case there is an emergency -- except this time. I've always known the moment would come, I just didn't think it would be this time.





I noticed that those assembled on the lawn were in the same boat: taken by surprise, feeling exposed, no credit cards, laptops or phones to distract us. We were a pitiful homogeneous bunch, waiting around for direction from someone in charge.

This unnerving experience along with the stories of recent celebrity deaths has prompted me to remember that inhaling one moment doesn't guarantee an exhalation. Even when medical knowledge gives us months to prepare for our exit, there is a definite moment when we are here, and then we simply aren't. It seems when anyone passes, we are all taken by surprise as I was during the hotel alarm. We do not seem to truly believe, as Hemingway said, that the bell will actually toll for us.

And when we move to the other side, no acquisitions or accolades we've garnered will mean anything as we stand empty handed, waiting for the next step from the one in charge.

As I watch the fireworks flash and fade this evening, remembering those who were alive one minute and gone the next so that I could live in a free country, I won't forget the one who died so that I can have freedom within, as well. And I won't forget that I have the same inevitable moment ahead of me: "In a flash, in the twinkling of an eye ... the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed." (1 Corinthians 15:52).

To Graduates: Swing Away!

My eldest, Katie, graduated from Anderson University a couple of weeks ago and is currently in Australia, living one of her life's dreams: feeding wallabies and holding koalas.

It's not hard for me to imagine Katie doing that; all I have to do is recall her in a plaid sundress feeding her stuffed animals with a pink plastic spoon about 19 years ago, and I can see it clearly.

For her graduation, I wrote Katie a letter, excerpted here, that I'd like to share with moms and graduates:

Author Marilyn Ferguson said, "It's not so much that we're afraid of change or so in love with the old ways, but it's that place in between that we fear. It's like being between trapezes."

That's where you are right now, graduate, letting go of the bar behind you, anticipating that second swing to take you to your future. In this split second of your life, you're precariously suspended in air, hoping all the preparation you've done won't fail you when your big moment arrives.

Don't be afraid to grab the incoming bar and swing away! You're more capable than you know. When you're apprehensive, remember that the power of Christ is in you, giving you his wisdom, helping you accomplish his purpose in your life: "For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose" ( Philippians 2:13). When you surrender your life to Christ, the task ahead of you is never greater than the power in you (1 John 4:4b).

CS Lewis said, "We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad."

Well, no one wants to see you "go bad!" I'm glad you're not in diapers or braces anymore, although I miss my little girl so much sometimes. But it's been fun watching you hatch into such a great young woman.

When you were small, I tried to save you every bump and bruise, believing that as long as you were an arm's length away, nothing could harm you. You didn't even go to the mailbox unwatched by my loving eye.

When you started driving and filling out college applications, I realized that from then on, you would be farther than my arm's reach and eye's sight for the rest of your life.

I was forced to recognize that not only was I not in control of every influence and circumstance around you, but that I never was. Moms only like to think we are in control, which is silly because the truth is that someone much greater and wiser is in control. As Emerson said, "All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen."

And so I learned to let go of you bit by bit, which is what's supposed to happen in families. I let go of my own trapeze, believing that God would see both of us through to what lay ahead knowing, "He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion" (Philippians 1:6).

So congratulations to my beautiful graduate — to all graduates.

You were born to fly for His glory -- swing away!

Linda Crow, of Muncie, is the mother of three and works in youth ministry. Visit her blog at www.2nd-cup-of-coffee.blogspot.com.

Challenge: Keeping In Step with the Spirit

Despite being married 23 years, I’m not a good cook.

Recently I overheard my husband, George, claim that living with me has been a life-long exercise in “faith-based eating.” Oh, that husband of mine, he’s so funny.

But he’s oh so right.

For example, once it was my turn to cook for a group of friends. Playing it safe, I prepared a stew which mainly required opening lots of cans. Imagine my horror when one friend ladled up a deadly-sharp can lid!

Now that you know the extent of my culinary deficits, you might be surprised to learn that I recently entered my church’s chili cook-off to benefit ALS.

Perhaps no one was more surprised than George.

But I did enter, a move not unlike a tone-deaf person auditioning for American Idol.

For weeks I tested several recipes until I finally concocted an original—which won the competition!

As Kelly Clarkson sang, “Some people wait a lifetime for a moment like this.” Or at least 23 years.

I’ve been so elated that I’ve been wearing my first-prize apron embroidered, “Grand Champion Chili Chef 2009” to school functions, church services, funerals, gynecology appointments, etc.

Oh, I kid. But I just can’t get over succeeding in a challenge I never dreamed possible.

George and I recently began hosting an Alpha group, where people come to wrestle with the big questions of life pertaining to faith. We were excited to begin, but for the first few weeks, we felt uncomfortable and a little incompetent, like I do in a kitchen.

Soon, we forged true friendships, sharing moments of spiritual growth that we never would have if we hadn’t said yes to the risky opportunity.

And last year, George began meeting weekly with an elementary student as part of the Kids’ Hope USA Program. At first he felt awkward and ineffective, but the student’s enthusiasm for their weekly meetings has affirmed George’s sense of purpose and fulfilled his desire to positively influence a student.

So maybe old dogs can learn new tricks. Because we were willing to feel uncomfortable for a little while, we’re leading a small group; George now has a precious new friend, and the world has a brand new chili recipe that totally rocks!

If we’re willing to find the places where God is at work and step into the game, we can shake off routine and make a difference. A little bit of discomfort can do a body and spirit good.

Galatians 5:25 says, “If we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.”

Is God calling you to take a step somewhere out of your comfort zone today? What will you miss if you don’t? What might you gain if you do?

When God Speaks, Are You Listening?

Tell me how you like to communicate, and I’ll guess how old you are.

If you rely on telephones, you’re probably reading this through bifocals.

If you prefer email and instant messages, you may be growing a wrinkle at this very moment because you’re in your 30s.

If you’re addicted to Facebook and/or texting, you’re under 25.
In fact, as soon as my daughter and her friend get in my car each day after school, they check their messages and begin texting. In a moment of revelation one day, I asked the friend, “Are you texting Kristin?” She grinned and nodded.
If I didn’t rank so low on their list, I might think they were secretly discussing me.
Kids aren’t the only ones texting friends in the same room; some parents occasionally text their kids when they’re at home.
While that might seem odd, think of texting as leaving a note in a lunch box, which I’ll bet you’ve done.
You can text your child a family joke, ask if he’s OK or send a caring message: “praying for you.”

Of course, texting can’t replace face-to-face communication, but you can make an appointment for a deeper discussion later. In the meantime, you’ve touched base with each other in a way teenagers enjoy.
Any activity or gizmo that dominates so much time in our lives is bound to have spiritual implications. Group Magazine offers great questions to ask your teen: “Does technology simplify or complicate your life? Do you like always being reachable? Why or not? How open are your communication lines with God?”

That last question hit home with me. I wondered how open my communication lines are with God. Am I just as accessible to God, or does he wait on the sidelines of my life for me to get back with him?

For instance, I’ve noticed that whether teens are engaged in birthday parties, movies or ball games, when they receive a message, they discreetly check it right away. They are always accessible.
Like them, I hope that when I sense a “God moment” I stop in my tracks to check in with prayer.
Because after all, God is not limited to influencing me through long periods Bible reading and prayer or sermons. He also gives me important warnings, encourages me to help others and inspires timely ideas for newspaper columns!

May we be as attentive to his voice as we are to our cell phones and email, and as quick to respond to God as Samuel was:
“The LORD came and stood there, calling as at the other times, ‘Samuel! Samuel!’ Then Samuel said, ‘Speak, for your servant is listening’” (1 Samuel 3:10).

When was the last time God got your attention in the middle of an impossibly busy moment?

Is your prayer life a balance of speaking and listening or mainly speaking?

John 10:12: “My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.”
Everyone loves a note in the lunch box--don’t miss God’s little messages to you throughout your day!

A Valentine Letter to Herself

COLUMN: A Valentine letter to herself
By Linda Crow • features@muncie.gannett.com • February 14, 2009
•
On Feb. 14, 1984, I was 21 and preparing to go on a Valentine's Day date. If I could speak to myself back then, here's what I'd say:

Dear Linda,
This is from the body formerly known as "you."
You're lingering at the mirror, turning this way and that. I wish you didn't care so much about imperfections, because you're more than the sum of body parts and clear skin. Significance comes from being God's child, not from a young man's opinion of you. So just step away from the mirror!

Let's talk about romance. Your date tonight is going to break your heart soon. Eventually the pieces get put back together, and you'll marry him next year, but the lesson of the breakup is important: there's one shining knight on a white horse who'll never fail you, and his name is Jesus. No human deserves Jesus' place in your heart. God intended your husband to be a good man, not a "god-man."

Your marriage is intact in 2009, but it's not because you've been great spouses. It's because you didn't leave God at the altar with the flowers. He has been your marriage's saving grace time and again. If God hadn't been your beacon in the fog all these years, you would have run your ship into rocks and squalls that would've made you a divorce statistic.

Good news! Over time, your husband finally learns to pick up his towels! Bad news: just this week he left dog biscuits in his pockets that went unnoticed until you removed the wet, gooey laundry.

But it turns out you made the right decision in marrying him. No one is perfect, and with time, you become aware that you prefer his faults over anyone else's. Plus, he brings you coffee every morning and occasionally bathes your little dog.
(2 of 2)

At 21, you don't know that real love entails a series of offenses and pardons. You'll bring out the best and worst in each other, and often you'll need 1 Peter 4:8 to help you through: "Love covers a multitude of sins."

Romance is wonderful, but a man who submits himself to Christ is even better because he answers to a higher authority and grows continually in learning to love. How could anyone ask for more?

My best advice to you is that when your hearts wander from your beacon and away from each other, remember to "return to your God. Hold fast to love and mercy, to righteousness and justice, and wait expectantly for your God continually" (Hosea 12:6). A favorite song says, "It takes a little time, sometimes, to turn the Titanic around, but baby, we're not going down." With God's help, you'll survive the storms.

Valentine's cards, roses and blushing cheeks may all lose luster, but living under the canopy of God's protection and grace allows love to endure and flourish for many years.
Now go have fun, you wrinkle-free young thing. Your future coffee-bringer awaits you!

When Setbacks Come, Don't Let Them Rob You of Your Confidence

Last January, I charged into a "Read-the-Bible-in-a-Year" plan like a souped up race horse breaking onto the track. It wasn't the first time I had tried the goal, but this time, I was determined to complete it.

Imagine how deflated I was to find myself starting again in April. Let's just say that this time I trudged out of the gate like a Belgian draft horse pulling a Levitical plow. It has been slow going, but I keep telling myself, "Slow and steady wins the race," or at least wins a sharp Sunday school lapel pin for managing to "stick to it!"

Why has this reading plan been so difficult? After all, I read a user-friendly version. I grew up hearing Bible stories and memorizing verses. I was a literature major, so I obviously enjoy reading. If you asked what book I'd take to a desert island, I'd reply, "The Bible." And I've received much guidance and comfort throughout my life from this book.

I do what I can to remind myself, placing my Bible on my nightstand, slipping it into my purse to read in waiting rooms, packing it on trips, sticking it in my tote bag, plopping it into my car -- it's always with me. Yet, I often find myself walking by it on the coffee table. Somehow, there's always one more laundry load or phone call or three more hours on the Internet before I can pick it up.

Unfortunately, my reading has been more of an exercise in discipline than an experience in learning and worshiping. And while there's nothing wrong with practicing diligence, my heart has not been fully engaged. It's like I've been reading a textbook account of an event as opposed to reading the personal letter of an eyewitness.

Although I was frustrated last April, I'm glad I didn't quit. Now I'm in the race with two goals: to finish my year-long project and to be transformed, which makes all the difference.

If you've recently set goals, don't be discouraged about false starts and distractions.

Remember how the rebuilding of the Lord's temple was stalled time and again. Zerubbabel, Jerusalem's governor, met lots of opposition as he began the project, but God sent the prophet Zechariah with encouragement: "Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin" (Zechariah 4:10).

When setbacks come, don't let them rob you of your confidence. When you fall, don't berate yourself for having leapt. Remember that failures have potential to make you more dependent on Christ, our ultimate strength and the only real measure of success.
Linda Crow, of Muncie, is the mother of three teenagers and works in youth ministry. Visit her blog at www.2nd-cup-of-coffee.blogspot.com.

Perfection is Not the Goal in Family Foundations

Linda Crow: Perfection is Not the Goal in Family Foundations

Recently, I created a gingerbread church from scratch, with stained-glass candy windows and a roof of candy shingles.

Since this was my first attempt, I gathered tips from experienced bakers and researched blueprints in order to prevent catastrophes. Even so, when I assembled the sections, I found odd structural problems.

None of the research advised that when your cookie sheet goes "boing" in the oven, your walls might warp, turning your creation into a wonky funhouse instead of a sweet fairy tale cottage.

I added candy to detract but only felt dissatisfied. I considered placing a gift-laden sleigh on the bowed roof to imply the cause of sinking, but I knew that camouflaging the flaws compromised the integrity of basic gingerbread principles. (I'm serious about this stuff!)

So, I heated a knife in a candle flame and painstakingly cut through the thick royal icing, removing one section at a time to begin again.

After reassembling it with truly flat pieces, I added ribbon candy, peppermints, gumdrops and dripping icicles, which I then enjoyed with a clear conscience -- no artful deceptions on my church!

My experience made me think about how real homes and churches get off-kilter, literally and figuratively, when they're built on shifting ground or with compromises in integrity.

Sometimes, couples try to candy-coat flawed relationships by buying more stuff, as if to say, "How could our marriage be bad? We have worked together to buy a great house, take tropical vacations, fill a four-car garage and enjoy lavish Christmases."

But if there are foundational flaws, the sugar frosting belies the funhouse incongruity in their hearts.

My parents, celebrating 66 years of marriage on Dec. 14, built my childhood home on a foundation of faith in Christ, and my brothers and I enjoyed the sweetness of a loving home as a result.

There weren't a lot of Dr. Phils or premarital counselors in 1942, and I'm sure there were bumps and cracks along the way, but they have always painstakingly sacrificed whatever it took to stay true to their vows and to God, their foundation.

No family is perfect, and I've learned through gingerbread baking that perfection is not the goal. I now embrace small glitches that prove my gingerbread wasn't stamped out in a factory but rolled out by my hands.

However, I'm grateful to know that when my marriage or my individual life shows signs of cracking or warping, I can bring the pieces to God, who straightens crooked hearts and rights wrong thinking.

And that is the good news of this season -- through the events of the first Christmas, God provided a way to re-build, restore and renew our relationship with Him and with each other. Those are indeed good tidings of great comfort and great joy.

Merry Christmas, and happy anniversary, Mom and Dad.

Check out Linda Crow's blog, www.2nd-cup-of-coffee.blogspot.com, to see pictures of her gingerbread house.

See yesterday's post for pics of this house.